Darker than your Wonderland, Chapters 1-3

Here's a Harry Potter fanfic.  I wrote it in 2011, but I'm now working on editing it.

I'm not the world's biggest Harry Potter fan - in fact, I haven't even read all of the books.  But something about Scorpius and Rose fascinates me, and I'm particularly proud of this story, in which they bond over books.  All of the books mentioned are real, and the descriptions are accurate, if biased towards what they want or need to see in them at any given time.  It has twenty-seven chapters, but I'll post them in batches of three.  You'll be able to find the others through the tags, or you can read the original, unedited, version here.

Darker Than Your Wonderland

1.      In Common

When Rose looked back, it was her first day of Hogwarts that stood out as the moment her life took a different direction.  That was the day she wasn't sorted into Gryffindor, against all expectations but her own.

She’d intended to think Gryffindor, to want Gryffindor with all her might, but when it came right down to it she just couldn’t make herself do it.  Rose had read everything she could about Hogwarts, ever since her mother had taught her how to read.  Despite all the family stories, she knew she was more of a Ravenclaw than a Gryffindor.  She’d managed to keep that a secret right up until the hat shouted it out to everyone.

It had helped that just a few minutes before she'd watched her cousin Al being sorted into Slytherin, and Scorpius Malfoy being sorted into Ravenclaw. She knew she wouldn't be alone in disappointing her parents.

In the common room after the feast, she’d sat down intending to write a letter home.  He'd sat down next to her, returning her shy smile.

Come to think of it, maybe her life had changed earlier that morning - on the train.

2.      Understanding

Rose had lost Al only after a few minutes afterembarking.  She assumed that he’d gone off with his brother and Rose's other cousin, James.

Rose pictured herself walking through the train, asking everyone if they’d seen her cousins. She decided she really wasn't in the mood to be that social. Instead, she sat down in the empty carriage, and pulled a book out of her pocket.  Al would find her if he needed her.

The door opened, and the boy she'd noticed earlier poked his head round.  Scorpius, she recalled, the boy her father had warned her against.  Rose examined his face; the blond hair, and the cheekbones which already looked finely sculpted, even at eleven.  His expression seemed haughty, but when his eyes met hers, he flushed pink.  He looked like he might say something, but, instead, dropped his eyes and made his way to the seat opposite without looking at her again.

Rose felt embarrassed, too. She never quite knew what to say to strangers.

He took a book from his pocket, a battered paperback.  Rose couldn't help but try to read the cover.  She made out the author’s name, Jack Williamson, but she couldn't see the title.  She gave up and went back to reading her own book.

After an hour or so, Rose looked up, and met Scorpius' eyes. She smiled shyly, feeling awkward again.

"What are you reading?" He asked. Silently, she held up her book, so he could read the cover.  He did the same with his.

Alice in Wonderland. Darker than You Think.

Rose felt her pale skin flush again, and felt an irrational hatred towards her father's genes. Stupid pale skin!  She felt embarrassed over her choice of book; Alice in Wonderland seemed so babyish!

Scorpius’ didn’t seem to notice her blush; he asked for a closer look at her book, so they swapped.

Rose had never read Darker Than You Think.  It was a muggle book, as far as she could tell, and although Rose had often been exposed to her grandparent's library, it was one she'd never come across.

"This is a muggle book?" Scorpio asked. She looked up.

"Yes," she said. "It's a classic. Everyone's heard of it."

He looked down. Rose regretted her comment, as she realised he might have taken it as a criticism.

"Everyone in the muggle world," she added, hurriedly. "I wouldn't expect a wizard to know it."

He looked up then, his blue eyes vulnerable. She understood him then, in that moment. Like her, he hated to feel stupid about anything.

"I've never heard of this," she continued, holding his book up, offering her own ignorance as a gift. "Is it a muggle book, or a wizard book?"

"It's a muggle book," he confirmed. She'd suspected as much; it was science-fiction, as far as she could tell, and wizards went in for that even less than muggles did. "I found it in our attic."

Rose wondered why his family had had muggle books in their attic, until she opened the book, and saw the name written inside the front cover. Severus Snape.

Rose knew of the history of her family, and of the Malfoys, and of Severus Snape.  She guessed that Scorpius' father had inherited, or otherwise taken possession of, Snape's belongings.  She wondered why Draco Malfoy had never disposed of them, but she knew enough to realise she should avoid the subject. She handed the book back.

"Do you like it?"

His face lit up.  He explained the way magic worked in the book, so different from how their spells worked, how fascinating he found it.  She'd made him promise to lend it to her when he'd finished rereading it for what he told her was the seventh time.  Then she’d told him about Alice, and he’d extracted a similar promise from her.

They discovered that they both loved stories of magic, any kind, as long as it was different from what they'd grown up with. She'd told him about her beloved Three Hearts and Three Lions knowing he'd understand the appeal, something her family never had.  Her mother shared her love of reading, of course, but what her mother loved was books about real magic. Hermione had never quite understood why Rose liked fantasy and science fiction. Rose’s grandparents hadn't either, but they'd been happy to take her to muggle bookshops whenever she visited them.

Rose realised that what Scorpius loved about Darker was the same thing she loved about Three  and other books like it. Magic, in those books, worked scientifically, had an explanation she could understand logically.  Even though she knew that that wasn't how magic worked.

3.

Later in the common room, Rose was cursing her Weasley genes again. When Scorpius had sat down next to her, the whispers had started, and she’d blushed as red as her hair. She was undeniably a Weasley – red hair, freckles – and he was undeniably a Malfoy, and every student in the room knew the history of their families.

Scorpius had kept his eyes focused on the parchment in front of him. He hadn't gone red, but Rose knew his refusal to look up was a sign of his own embarrassment.

Apart from the stares, the Ravenclaw common room was heaven. Three of the four walls were covered with bookcases, with comfortable sofas and desks taking up space in the middle of the room.  Rose reached behind her, and took some books from the nearest shelf, stacking them in front of her and Scorpius.  He'd looked up when he realized what she was doing and smiled at her properly.

"Good idea," he said quietly. She smiled back, and gestured to her own sheet of parchment.

"I don't know how I'm going to tell them," she confessed.

"Your parents? Me either. The Malfoys have been Slytherins for generations -"

" – and the Weasley's have been in Gryffindor for even longer!"

They exchanged a wry smile, realizing that they were fast friends, already.

"That's what father says," Scorpius continued. "But I've looked at the family tree. Father's cousin, Nymphadora Tonks, was a Hufflepuff. And grandmother's cousin, Sirius Black, was a Gryffindor! It's about time we had a Ravenclaw in the family!"

Rose knew he was rehearsing. It wasn't her he was trying to convince, or himself. It was his father.

He'd know as well as she did that those arguments wouldn't work on the Draco Malfoy she'd heard about.  They were both Ravenclaws after all, he wasn’t a fool.  So either she didn't know Draco as well as she thought she did or Scorpius was unduly optimistic.  She'd guess the former; she'd only heard stories told by Draco’s enemies, and Scorpius had grown up with the man.

Rose filed that thought away for future reference, and looked down at her own parchment. Chewing her lip, she decided to go for the fast and brutal option.

Dear daddy,

I'm in Ravenclaw! I guess you were right about me inheriting mother's brains!

Love,

Rose

PS – did you hear that Al's in Slytherin?

There. She'd appealed to her father's affections, complimented her mother, and, if none of that worked, dropped Al in it too. Damage limited.

Part 2 is here.

In Which We Discuss Three Hearts and Three Lions

Three Hearts and Three Lions is an interesting novel. Written in 1953, it follows the story of Holger Carlson, a Scandinavian. Escaping from Nazi's, he becomes unconscious. On waking, he has no idea where he is. Nearby, however, is a suit of armour that fits his unusually large frame perfectly, and a horse that seems to recognise him.

Holger finds himself wearing the banner and carrying the shield of the knight of three hearts and three lions, a warrior whom everyone in this strange world seems to have a grudge against. Holger soon gains allies suitable to the odd situations he finds himself in; a dwarf and a maiden who can turn herself into a swan at will. They journey onwards, and Holger finds himself in the middle of a war in which he appears to play an important part, although no-one can tell him how or why.

I love this book. It's not aged at all, perhaps because it's fantasy. Parts of it are absolutely hilarious, but the plot itself remains serious. It does use the 'off-the-peg' fantasy figure of Morgan le Fay (King Arthur's sister who shows up as the villain in every single fantasy story about knights every written), and many other characters are recognisable to any fantasy aficionado. However, the plot, and Holger's modern thinking and ideas about the fantasy world are interesting. Many of the characters speak in a colloquial Scottish accent, which frankly can be a tad irritating at times. Still, the main flaw with the book is the length; it's far too short. On reaching the end of the book, I was sorely tempted to merely begin it again, so unwilling was I for it to end. The book doesn't seem suitably finished with the ambiguous ending it is given, and more than anything, I wish a sequel were available (unfortunately, the author died in 2001).

In summary, it's a great book; funny, well written, intelligent, and absorbing. It just ends too soon.

In Which We Discuss My Favourite Book

...it's Jinian Footseer, by Sheri Tepper, closely followed by Billie Lett's Where the Heart Is.

I found Jinian Footseer in a charity shop when I was about eleven or twelve. There wasn't much of a blurb on the back - just a quote from a song in the book. I can't recall the other couplet, but it ended with this;

Eye of the Star
Where Old Gods Are.

Players, take your places. The land itself calls Game!

The reason I need to remember that is because the cover has been loved clean off in the last decade. The tops of a few pages are missing as well, near the beginning. I should really get a new copy, but they're a little tricky to find.

Although the back cover wasn't very informative, it seemed interesting. Intriguing. Jinian, on the cover, looked interesting too, her and the Oracle. I suspect this is where my long-lived desire for ruddy red hair came from.

The book drew me in right from the beginning. It talks about a strange world, and peoples with strange Talents (which I wrote a little more on here). It's a curious mix of medieval adventure and fantasy, but infinitely more readable. It's like a feminine version of Poul Anderson's work, if anyone out that is familiar with that, a little like Three Hearts and Three Lions. I can't pinpoint exactly why - the content isn't obviously similar, and there are a few differences, mostly the masculine/feminine thing I mentioned. That, and Anderon's hero was much more familiar with our modern world, while Jinian is completely separate.  And Tepper doesn't go near Arthurian legends.  But still...

As I get older, I see more things in the book. At one point, for instance, Jinian is touched by a Shadow, and becomes disheartened. The connection between her mind and body is broken, and although she continues moving for a while, out of habit, she can't bring herself out of her slump. Then, at other times, she is struck with a wild sense of activity, with no direction. She suffers from insomnia, too.

I read the book a few years before I suffered through my worst points with manic depression, but Tepper's writing describes the illness perfectly. I'm going to quote a small passage from the book here.

"And now you must decide which pain you will bear. That of being as you were. Or that of being as you are."


I brought myself up to my knees. That was as far as I could get. The hand that had held the teacup appeared again, a full cup in it, the steam rising into my nose. I gulped it, interrupting the gulps with sobs. "Pain of being as I am? I don't understand."


"But of course you do. The pain of curiosity unsatisfied, of ambition unfulfilled. The pain of love unreturned, of devotion undeserved. The pain of friendship rejected, of leadership ridiculed. The pain of loneliness and labor. Silly child. Did you think living was easy?"


Well, I had, of course. Not really easy, perhaps, but easier than this. I guess all children expect life to be easy. It seems easy, just looking at it from the outside. Being half-dead, as I had been for the past while was easier than this.


"It's easier to be dead," she said, seeming to Read me. "Always."


"I think I would rather be alive," I managed to say. "Even if it hurts."

There are other passages I've found meaning in, over the years. I couldn't tell you how many times I've read the book, but there's something new in it every time.

Incidentally, that's why my username is Bartelmy. Bartelmy of the Ban is the non-narrating character speaking in that passage.

When I first read the book, at the age of eleven or twelve, I was concerned only with Jinian's point of view. As I grew older, I began to understand the other characters, to gain sharper insights into them as I became more experienced, more life-full. Suddenly, when I was nineteen or maybe twenty, Bartelmy's viewpoint struck me. Not fully, but enough for me to realise how much myself and my life had changed since I first read the book. I go a little further into my past usernames and their logic here, if anyone's interested. I would like to add that it's not the literal aspect of the mother with which I'm concerned - more a less conventional kind of change, which, though not really motherly, is still part of growing up as a woman. If that makes sense.

Jinian Footseer is part of a trilogy of trilogies, written in the eighties, and scarcely reprinted since then. A few of the other novels, namely those containing Peter's adventures and those continuing Jinian's were mentioned at the end. I looked for them for years - this was before the internet, remember, or at least before I had regular access to it. I looked in charity shops, keeping an eye out for anything by Tepper. I never found anything else of Tepper's second hand, ever. I looked at the library, and it even looked as though Balsall Heath had a copy of Jinian Star-Eye...but, it was lost.

I did find a copy of The True Game, a printing which brings together the three Peter novels, King's Blood Four, Necromancer Nine, and Wizard's Eleven. I was about fifteen then, I think, and since it was a reprint, I was able to order it from Waterstones.  Incidentally, I picked up a lot of Tepper's other novels when they were printed by Gollancz in the early years of the last decade.  The Visitor and Beauty are particularly good, as are Plague of Angels, Grass and the rest of the Arbai Trilogy, and The Gate to Women's Country, and -

Oh, just read them all.  You won't regret it.

Peter's story overlaps with Jinian's near the end of his third book, and the beginning of her first, although the main part of it is set towards the end. The other two books in the Jinian series, Dervish Daughter and Jinian Star-Eye, I found on amazon, when I was nearly nineteen.  They're about £30 together, but I picked them up separately, since I already had the first one.

The final trilogy, the Mavin Manyshaped books, I also found on amazon. However, they were quite expensive - about £30 for the combined edition. You don't want to know how much they are separately. However, a few weeks ago a cheap copy popped up, and my friend bought it for me. It's sitting on my shelf over there, waiting for me to be finished rereading the Jinian novels (I read the Peter series last week). I want to be properly ready before I finally read the entire series.

Incidentally, since Mavin is Peter's mother, her books are, I believe, chronologically before Peter and Jinian's, although she does show up throughout all six of the others. It's possible that her books encompass the whole series, in much the same way that Jinian's and Peter's overlap.

Another interesting element of the series is the fact that, although Peter was conceived first (or at least, written first), and Jinian is, technically, a companion character, she's also fully realised. When she shows up in Peter's novel, she doesn't reveal her whole history, or foreshadow very much of it at all. Nothing's contradicted, but Jinian is a far more subtle and internal person than Peter, and since all of the books are written from the first person viewpoint, one can only know what Peter knows. I will say though, that I wish the first Peter novel had included mention of where he and Jinian first met. I know that it's unlikely he'd remember, or think it at all important, but a tiny mention would have been enough. It would have leant the series even greater depth and entanglement through the various plots, although it's not like it suffers overmuch through the lack of it.

In Which We Discuss The Witcher

I first heard about the videogame The Witcher when I was randomly clicking on links on TV Tropes -

- you know, I just went to take a look at that site again, to double check which article I first found mention of the Witcher on, and it sucked me right in again. It's the Wikipedia effect, as illustrated by XKCD:



- anyway, yes, I heard about The Witcher on TV Tropes. It was mentioned because the results of the many moral choices you make in the game aren't immediately apparent. For instance, choosing to spare someone in the first act may change what happens in, for example, the fourth act. I thought that was fascinating, so I read some more about the game, then went and got the library to order the book (written by Andrzej Sapkowski) for me.

I started reading the book last night, and I can really see why it was made into a game. It's got a very strong mythological feel, and a lot of the events The Witcher comes up against are loosely based on fairy tales, but more horrible (reminding me of Tanith Lee in places). It also reminded me a little of Three Hearts and Three Lions, by Poul Anderson. It's a really fascinating fantasy novel, and I wants the sequels. Now please.