In Which We Discuss Audible Badges

So, my Audible app just updated itself and now it has a whole bunch of new badges on it.  Or, rather, they are almost the exact same badges that were on there before but now they work slightly better.

The new badges are as follows, in alphabetical order.   The entries with question marks are those that I don't actually have yet.

Edit: my app just (18th September 2020) updated to announce I'd achieved the silver level of The Librarian.  I passed 200 books long ago, so I suspect there's been some kind of update.

Badge Name	What to Do	Basic	Silver	Gold
The Annotator	Add a bookmark with a note.	10 bookmarks	40 bookmarks	125 bookmarks
Bitesized Bookworm	Listen to parts of different titles in one day.	3 titles	15 titles	40?
7 Day Stretch	Complete books in one week (note; I earned this by marking books I'd read before as 'finished', not by listening to them all in one week).	3 books	5 books	10 books
Deja Vu	Listen to books multiple times.	3 times	10?	20 times
Done and Dusted	Listen to one complete book, start to finish.	1 book	3 books	5 books
The Epic	Complete  titles over x hours long.	20 hours	35 hours	50 hours
High Noon	Listen during lunchtime (hours do not have to be consecutive!)	1 hour	2 hours	3 hours
The Librarian	Collect audiobooks!	50?	200	500?
Marathoner	Listen for hours in a row.	2 hours	5 hours	8 hours
Night Owl	Listen during the evening or night (hours do not have to be consecutive!)	4 hours	6 hours	8 hours
The Optimist	Have unfinished books in your library.  They must be downloaded and marked as unfinished.	10?	20?	75?
On the Trot	Listen to a portion of an audio book every day.	7 days in a row	30 days in a row	90?
Social Butterfly	Share something to facebook or twitter from the app.	5 times	25 times	100 times
Stats Surfer	View the stats screen.	50 times	200 times	500?
Weekend Warrior	Listen during the weekend (hours do not have to be consecutive!)	5 hours	10 hours	24 hours

In Which We Discuss Books I Read in my 26th Year, Week 15/52

So, I read five books lasy week.  Not bad.  I also succeeded in getting my unread pile down to 100, though I promptly picked up a few audio books.  I normally go for audio books I've read before, so listening to totally new novels will be a new experience for me.

Speaking of new novels, both Sushi for Beginners and 50 Ways to Find a Lover have been in my unread pile for a while.  Years, in fact.  I'm glad I finally got around to both because I really enjoyed them.  They're both 'chick-lit', a genre which I have a not-so-secret passionate for.  Sushi for Beginners was wonderfully predictable.  The assholes got what they deserved.  The people I liked got what they deserved.  It was comfortable, but just surprising enough to be interesting.

I mostly liked 50 Ways to Find a Lover because of the main character.  She was disgusting, in a very lovable and realistic way.  All the stuff you do in secret but don't admit to, she doesn't care.  I kind of like that.

Dear Everybody I didn't like so much.  It was an image of a suicidal man's life built up from letters he left behind, by his delusional and naive younger brother.  A quick read, but not that amazing.

I loved the short stories though.  Philip K. Dick may not be good at titles, but he was a good storyteller.  I really liked them once I got into them, though they were sitting on my unread pile for a while before then.

Finally, Double Star.  I read that for a book club.  I only decided to go at the last minute, and the book just dragged me in.  Very short, under two hundred pages, and I read it over one day.  About an actor who is hired to temporarily fill in for a kidnapped politician.  We had fun at the bookclub.  We found out what we were all like at fifteen.

I have decided that "what were you like at fifteen?" is the best ice-breaking question ever.  No one has a boring answer.

In Which We Discuss Christine

I first read Christine in 2008.  Since then, I have described it as 300 pages of plot in a 700 page novel.  I'm not totally sure if I feel that way any more.  A second read through has allowed me to take my time and absorb the plot more without being so impatient to get to the end.  I enjoyed it more, but it's still not in my top ten.

The book reminds me a little of my grandfather; he named his car Christine.

I started making a playlist using the songs quoted in the book, but accidentally returned the book to the library before I finished it.  It's a very good playlist; I particularly enjoyed Woody Guthrie's Take You Ridin' in my Car.

James Smythe seems to have had a similar opinion to myself on this one, though, as always, he's expressed it rather better.

I finished Christine almost a week ago, and it's taken me this long to write this much.  The next book is Pet Semetary, which I've also read before, probably about the same time as Christine.  I picked that up from the library a few days ago and still haven't started - it's been a busy week.

In Which We Discuss Books I Read in my 26th Year, Week 14/52

Firstly, some news.  I'm on a final written warning at work due to absence.  Mostly it's because I took two months off in the middle of summer due to depression.  The straw that broke the camel's back was the recent five days I took off when I had such a bad cold that I nearly fainted one day, after not being to eat.  All very sad.

I thought of this when writing this post because it lasts for a year.  I'm already 14 weeks, or nearly three months, into being 26.  So maybe it won't be that long until I'm 14 weeks into 27, with a clear record again.

I listened to The Vagina Monologues rather than read them.  I really don't enjoy Eve Ensler's performance, not as much as I did seeing it performed last year.  I listened to it in the car with my new boyfriend.  He quite enjoyed it.  He grew up outnumbered by sisters, so he's already well broken in.

I read Perks of Being a Wallflower because it's been sitting on my kindle for ages and because the film got such good reviews.  It was awful.  Halfway through, it came as a shock to learn that the narrative character was supposed to be a highly literate, intelligent sixteen-year-old and not a slightly simple eight-year-old.  Writing like someone who doesn't communicate well can be used to great effect - for example, The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time - but not when the character in question is being raved about by other characters for their writing skills.

Last Continent is another one I listened to.  A Discworld book, which I've read before.  I appear to be listening to all of the Discworld books, in no particular order.  I've since moved on to Monstrous Regiment, so you'll see that pop up in a week or two.  Nigel Planer gives an excellent performance, and his accent doesn't wander nearly so much as the Egyptian one he attempted for Pteppic's father in Pyramids.

Christine was part of my Stephen King Chronological Reading Project.  I really need to get a move on and write a proper post for that, I finished it two days ago.

I first read Christine in 2008.  At the time, I felt it had about half as much plot as the pages actually required.  I read it with less impatience this time, and enjoyed it a little more.  The next one will be Pet Semetary, which I've also read before, and which I'll pick up from the library tomorrow.

Big Girls don't cry is yet another old favourite.  I first read it at fifteen or sixteen and it blew me away.  One particular line has been adopted as my personal philosophy; get the foundations right and the building can go up anyhow it likes.  The line applies to underwear and clothing, but I think of it as applying to all beauty.  Master clear skin, well-cut hair and neat eyebrows, and don't bother to put make-up on everyday, is my philosophy.

Finally, Grimm Tales Made Gay.  Humourous verses based on Grimm's Fairytales.  I read it at work.  Short and amusing.

In Which We Discuss Books I Read in my 26th Year, Week 13/52

Another slow week.  I've been working my way through The Second Sex, so everything else has pretty much taken a back seat to that.

Aberystwyth Mon Amour is a hard-boiled detective novel set in Aberystwyth, a quite little Welsh seaside town.  The juxtaposition is kind of funny, and it's an interesting read.  I had a really nice day trip to Aberystwyth back in February, and I saw them in the museum then, so I bought it when it popped up cheaply on Kindle.

Rivers of London is a police procedural meets Harry Potter.  MET Cop learns magic is real, learns some, hunts ghost-serial-killer who is murdering through evil voodoo puppetry.  I'm reading it for a bookclub.  The meeting isn't for quite a while, but I was on a Sunday shift at work, and we can generally get away with reading then.  Only paperbacks, no kindles, hence why I didn't get on with The Second Sex (the bookclub for that is this Saturday!).

I actually read the sequel to this a while ago.  I don't remember disliking it, but though I've had Rivers of London on my bookcase for a while I just haven't gotten around to actually reading it till now.

In Which We Discuss Loving Me, Fearing Me, and Doing What I Say

This isn't about books for once, unless you want to count the Labyrinth mangas.  Instead, it's about characters who are locked in, which I think may be better presented visually.

The quote comes from Jareth, the Goblin King of the Labyrinth.  My middle name is Jareth, incidentally.  Anyway, the full line is;

"Love me, fear me, do as I say...and I will be your slave."

I like that line.  Jareth is expressing want and need and desire in the only way he is able to - through force and domination.  It's a roundabout way to do it, really.  He can't admit to wanting, or needing - he can only issue that ultimatum of a scenario - that he would do anything for someone who loved him, and reciprocated his fealty.

Jess, of the Gilmore Girls is a similar character.  I'm just watching the episode in which Rory graduates from Chilton, and when I say 'just' I mean it's paused in another tab.  Jess has been working as hard as he can; he was putting in 40+ hour weeks at work, working at Luke's and trying to keep up with his school work.  Unfortunately, his attendance let him down; despite being able to keep up, he was told he would not be allowed to graduate and needed to repeat that year.  This meant he would not be able to take Rory to prom, something she had been dreaming about.  When Luke found out - Luke being Jess' uncles and a very similar character - neither of them were able to have the heart-to-heart they desperately needed.  Jess could not obtain support, and Luke didn't realise he needed it - instead, he told him to find somewhere else to live.  Jess ran away to California, to live with his absent father.  He couldn't build up the courage to tell Rory before he left.

In this episode, Jess keeps calling Rory and remaining silent.  Eventually, she acknowledges that she knows it's him, says goodbye, and that she loved him but she's moving on.  Jess couldn't ask for this; he could only present himself and hope that some closure would be offered.  It comes from the same sort of place as equating love with putting yourself entirely in someone else's hands - something you are only willing to do if they reciprocate with love, fear, and obedience.  Jareth asks for such high stakes because that's what he's offering in return.  He expresses love through domination and need from a place of power because he isn't strong enough to show need from a place of weakness.  He cannot ask that someone accepts him only as he stands and then wait to be accepted or rejected.  He has to put himself on a throne or a pedestal first and then issue the invitation from there, as if he doesn't care what the answer will be.

In Which We Discuss Books I Read in my 26th Year, Week 12/52

I read a LOT this week.  From Wednesday, I was off work with some sort of terrible lurgy.  I pretty much just slept and read for three or four days in a row.  Didn't eat which is probably why I fainted halfway through.

A Doll's House is a play I've read before.  Again, it's on wikisource, so I read it on a quiet Tuesday at work.  It's a classic, and considered to be one of the first if not the first feminist plays.  I saw it performed at the Birmingham rep when I was sixteen, which is ten years ago now.

True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle is another one I first read years ago.  Just over fifteen years ago actually - it was a gift for my eleventh birthday.  I think my friends just went round their local charity shops and came out with a handful of books, but I'm glad this is one of them.  It just blew me away.  It's about a proper young Victorian miss who ends up witnessing a mutiny on a ship.  Newbury Medal winner.

According to wikipedia;

A film adaption of the book is in development. It is to be written and directed by Danny DeVito, starring Morgan Freeman as Zachariah and Pierce Brosnan as Jaggery. Dakota Fanning was originally cast as Charlotte Doyle, but had to drop out as production was continually halted and she eventually grew too old for the part. Saoirse Ronan was later cast, but she also grew too old. Locations are being scouted in Ireland and shooting is set for July 2014.

Exciting!

I read The Eternal Enemy because I loved Remember Me by the same author.  Eternal Enemy is about a young girl who buys a VCR which can record the future.  She records the news and tries to prevent terrible accidents, until the day she sees her own face on there.  Unfortunately, she doesn't get all of the broadcast...something goes wrong.

That plot was described in Remember Me by Peter, one of the characters.  When I found out that Pike had actually written it, I just had to read it.  It's pretty interesting.   Heads off into sci-fi rather than horror, much like Koji Suzuki's Ring Trilogy does.

Silver Birch, Blood Moon is the fifth in a series of modernised or reimagined fairy tale anthologies edited by Ellen Datlow and Terri Windling.  I wrote a slightly longer post about the series here.

Because this volume was the first I read, I have a special fondness for it.  I love Precious obviously, but also the incredibly creepy retelling of Thumbelina, the romantic Rumpelstiltskin, and the terrible story of one of the princes who didn't make it through Sleeping Beauty's hedge.  Less fond of the retelling of Snow White, who lives in an iron graveyard and dies of tetanus.

Music Theory for Dummies is a book I bought myself for my birthday, along with my keyboard.  It's been pretty useful.  Took me a while to get through it, and I didn't quite take in all the bits about permutations of chords, but that's also covered in Piano and Keyboard All-in-One for Dummies which I'm currently reading.

Unsouled is the third part of Neal Shusterman's Unwind series.  It's set in a universe where abortion is not allowed, but you can have troublesome teenagers 'unwound' - that is, taken apart for parts.  Every cell is kept alive and donated to someone who needs it.  It's an interesting and well-written series, which really goes into the ramifications of that idea.

Finally, Don't Tell the Groom is one that popped up on Kind of Book, a site which will notify you of heavily reduced Kindle books.  I don't subscribe any more, because it was making my unread pile grow uncontrollably.

Speaking of which, my unread pile is now down to 107.  My goal is still to get it down to 100 or less by the end of the year, so I'm well on track for that, as long as I don't buy any more.

Anyway, Don't Tell the Groom.  It's about a woman who accidentally gambles away her wedding savings and then tries to organise a cheaper wedding on the sly so the groom won't find out.  She tells him she wants it to be a surprise, and from a money-saving point of view, it's interesting.  Some nice ideas, and even a shout out to Martin Lewis.  The gambling support is fairly well done too, though I'm not totally convinced at how easily the main character gave up on her bingo addiction.  I've never had an addiction, but it seems like it would take more than realising you have a problem, deciding to give up, and then only slipping up twice - once spending about £5 on scratchcards and once almost stealing a scratchcard from another bride's wedding favours.  It all seems a bit too easy. 

I mostly picked it up because it's very 'chick-lit', but touched on a serious issue which doesn't normally have a place in that genre.  I feel like more could have been done with it, but it was still a decent read.